I remember as a very childless very young married man talking about how I looked forward to homeschooling and “molding” the minds of my children.
Pretty demeaning to them and pretty stupid.
They mold back. They have their own gifts. They have their own personalities. They have their own goals. They have their own choices.
God had Adam in a controlled environment with controlled information and Adam failed his first and only test as soon as God left him on his own. God seems to have a record of failure as a parent (unless we actually admit that the children have some responsibility)
Hear, O heavens, and give ear, O earth;
for the Lord has spoken:
Children have I reared and brought up,
but they have rebelled against me.
The ox knows its owner,
and the donkey its master’s crib,
but Israel does not know,
my people do not understand (Isaiah 1.2, 3).
I’m using a rather negative example to make a point, but the point has a positive side. Children are often better than their parents. They eventually know better how their lives will go.
Obviously, in this case, the analogy with God as our parent breaks down. But another analogy can be used. “Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” Our children are not the Incarnation, but having been baptized, they too, by God’s act in baptizing them, have been adopted. “I will be to him a father, and he shall be to me a son.” You’re a steward with authority for many years, but you can’t know everything and you have to let go eventually. So you can’t make all your decisions when you do have authority as if you knew what’s to come.
And there is something wonderful about it all. If parents could be potters then we’d never hear of conversions from non-Christian homes and the social engineering attempt by the public schools would work perfectly.
I’ve decided, having heard this before, that while the examples (Adam in the Garden, Israel) are certainly relevant to the discussion, they’re pretty much not the same thing, and are only one small piece of the puzzle. For instance, the book of Proverbs is another part, so is Deut. 6, so is Eph. 6, etc.
Isaiah 1:2-3 is notable in part because it is so shocking – everyone knows that children ordinarily follow their parents; everyone knows that even an ox or a donkey knows its master, but Israel is so rotten as to turn this on its head.
It’s like the covenant – the promises to parents for their children and gracious and many, and may be firmly trusted, just like the promises of God to the church. But there is no mechanical “automatic” result: everything depends on God, and we depend on God in faith, both to make us faithfully follow him, and to be a gracious God to us and to our children, to save us and them.
God IS a potter of course, and warns his people -not all of whom rebelled! – not to be rebellious clay, lest he break the pot. That’s part of how we mold our children – through reminding them of what they ought to do, and how God is the real potter and they may/can/should/must (insert all inducements and threatenings here) submit to God, lest they be cast aside.
So sure, you’re a potter.
Blessings,
Doug
I think parents are “potters” in the sense that they attempt to mold and shape, praying that their efforts will bear fruit. But God is the ultimate potter. The proverbs are there as wisdom, but we all know examples of children who were raised in Christian homes being taught the truths of the whole Bible, including the proverbs, who, because of sin and rebellion, turned from the the instruction of their parents and God. Thankfully, God is gracious and often restores those children who rebel against their Christian upbringing.
I couldn’t agree with you more, Mark. Being a father has humbled me, too, making me realize how little I can shape and mold my children. So much is already built in, isn’t it? One thing I can do is help them avoid the worst extremes of their own tendencies. And on a more positive note, I can also love them dearly and lead by example. But in the end, they are who they are. And thank God for that!
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Are you going for effect/overstatement? It seems to me that surely parents are a very significant factor in shaping their kids. And isn’t that what people mean when they say “potter”? I don’t think that’s arrogant – I think it’s just acknowledging reality. If parents aren’t a significant factor, then are we to believe that rich suburban kids turn out more succesful because they’re innately/genetically superior to the kids who grew up in the projects and struggle just to survive? I get your point and am with you 95% of the time, but I think the above take pretty overstated.