A Question of Life

Since reading on Christmas morning that 8 months pregnant Laci Peterson had disappeared, I have followed this story with hope that it might have a happy ending. As the weeks and then months wore on, that seemed highly unlikely. It seemed so horribly tragic to me that this young woman, about to give birth to her first child should vanish without a trace. As I’ve watched the events of the past week unfold I’ve been saddened further and deeply troubled to learn it is likely her husband may have been the one who ended her and her unborn son’s life prematurely. However, that point has not been decided and so I do not feel I should spend too much time dwelling on the question of Scott Peterson’s guilt or innocence.

What was interesting to me was the California prosecutors’ decision to charge the main suspect with a double homocide in this case. Though this is in keeping with California law, it still seemed a boon for the stance that an unborn baby is very much a person and that to end such a life warrants criminal prosecution. Of course, a New Jersey NOW chapter has already come forward to express indignation about said decision. Here is an article from the Daily Record (Mom, Dad, sibs, do you remember this newspaper?) which begins, “The head of the National Organization for Women’s Morris County chapter is opposing a double-murder charge in the Laci Peterson case, saying it could provide ammunition to the pro-life lobby…” Hmmmmm.

Read on, if you like. I think it will be interesting to watch this case unfold, esp as it pertains to the question of life before birth. Our nation continues to contradict itself with its approach to fetal life. It is incomprehensible to me how people can mourn the loss of this little unborn baby boy (which I think is highly appropriate given the extreme tragicness of his death) and yet condone the murder of millions of other little babies who also will never get the chance to meet their mothers and enjoy a life of their own. My prayer is that the case of Baby Connor and his mother Laci will stir some hearts to question what we as a nation allow to happen every day in our midst.

Technical Difficulties

The main purpose of this entry to explain our lapse in blogging recently. We’ve had computer troubles of varying kinds and though the end is in sight we are still without our faithful link to the outside world. I’ll allow Jay to elaborate on all this at another time. Till we are up and blogging again, hello to all our faithful readers and visitors and we look forward to talking with you again soon.

I Stay In My Big Boy Bed!!

Is the cheery little announcement I hear each morning when I open the door to Jonathan’s room. There he sits, looking very tiny in the midst of his “big boy bed”, waiting patiently for Mommy or Daddy to get him up.

Even though we welcomed a new baby in July, we felt it was a bit early to move Jonathan out of his crib and into a big boy bed. Besides his age, there were so many other essential changes due to the arrival of a baby brother and already it was a rather rough time for Jonathan, who was still very much a baby himself!

Some kind friends of ours graciously loaned their lovely crib for us to use upstairs, since Nicolas would need the nursery crib. Thank you, Omases!! For 12 months now Jonathan has slept happily in their crib. We set up a twin bed in his new room, in addition to the crib. Several visitors have been able to use it when they stayed over at the house, but for the most part it has been decorative in nature, as well as a comfy place to pile on together for book reading times.

Not anymore! A couple of weeks ago Jonathan made a comment about how he’d like to go sleep in the bed in his room. Jay and I said something about “soon” and we left it at that thinking it might be a passing wish. But when Jonathan persisted we relented and last week I put him in bed for his nap in the big boy bed. Which he promptly climbed out of within about 5 minutes. We had a “talk” and I put him back in his crib. Next day he again requested the bed. We talked again about how we cannot jump out of our bed whenever we wish*** and that we must wait till Mommy comes to get us out, etc.

And, to our surprise and delight, he stayed! And has done beautifully for over a week now. When he wakes up, he reads his books or plays with his animals until we open the door. How nice to have a smooth transition to a new stage of life!

I have learned something from this little experience: instead of us choosing when something new would happen, Jonathan clearly indicated a desire to make the change himself, and though it wasn’t his first inclination to actually stay put in the bed, he seemed to have the desire to follow through with our parameters (ie, having to stay in the bed to keep the privilege) in order to remain in the big boy bed. And he is quite proud of his accomplishment.
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***Some of you may wonder at our insistence that Jonathan stay put in his bed till we give him the “all clear” to get up. It has been our experience that children don’t always know when it is time to get up and if we tell them they may get up and play whenever they wake, their day may well start around 5am or other such ridiculously early hour. In addition, it is helpful to know that in general, we need not fear the preschoolers are wandering the halls, potentially getting themselves into some sort of trouble or accident. This is perhaps of greater importance now that we have stairs since they could get hurt if trying to navigate them in the dark. But even before we lived in a two-story home, we asked Abigail to remain in her bed till we got her up. She still does this, but since she is a lot bigger, she knows to get up and use the bathroom, for instance, if she needs and then head back to bed to either rest or read for a few minutes more.

Baby Einstein

This past Christmas, Nicolas’ Aunt Jennifer and Uncle Mark gave him a Baby Einstein video entitled “Baby Beethoven”. For those of you not familiar with the Baby Einstein line of products, they range from books to video to cds to toys which are aimed at introducing babies and children to music, art, language, science and nature in playful, enriching ways. I’ve been aware of these products for some time now but never actually purchased any to use at home. How delighted I am that Jennifer thought to give this to Baby Nicolas. He, as well as his two older sibs absolutely love it and so does their Mommy! (Thank you Jennifer!)

I have always felt that exposing children to music from birth on, and helping them to learn to enjoy it is so important and here is yet another way we can do that. But the kids don’t necessarily realize they are being serenaded by some of Beethoven’s finest works; they just enjoy the pretty colors and shapes and little animals they see dancing and moving to the music.

Though I don’t advocate having kids sit in front of the tv for too long, this is one video we enjoy watching together, and it is also pleasant to listen to if I am cooking dinner in the next room, because it is rather soothing (unlike some children’s videos and music!).

Anyway, I will watch for some of the other Baby Einstein products in my travels and look forward to trying them out.

Conversations with Abigail

Taken as verbatim as I can recall from a conversation during our early morning drive to ballet class today:

Abigail: Mommy? Someday I would like to go visit Noah and the Ark.
Tricia: Oh really? Hmmmmm.
Abigail: Yes, Mom, someday when I am bigger I want to go see Noah.
Tricia: Well, honey, we can’t actually go see Noah.
Abigail: Why not? Does he live very far away?
Tricia: No dear, because Noah lived a very long time ago and now he is in heaven with God.
Abigail: Oh.
Tricia: Yes, he lived a good long life and after he was very old God took him home to live with him in heaven.
Abigail: Ok Mommy, but when I get really really really really really big and much older and bigger and very taller then I will try to go see Noah because he listened to God and he built the ark like God told him to.
Tricia: Oh.

And to wrap up the day, as she was getting her jammies on tonight, she looked way back in her closet and discovered an old dress of mine that I wore for my ninth grade graduation in Saudi Arabia which I have set aside for her to do with as she pleases when she is older. This is what we talked about then:

Abigail: Mommy, is this my dress?
Tricia: Well, sort of. That is a dress I wore when I was younger, when I was a big girl.
Abigail: And will I wear it when Jonathan and I get married?
Tricia: What?
Abigail: Is it my dress to wear when Jonathan and I get married?
Tricia: Sweetheart, you and Jonathan aren’t going to get married.
Abigail: No Mom, I mean when we are really big and really older then I will wear this dress and we will get married.

Martha Would Frown

As I was making preparations for this evening’s supper (we were having company) it dawned upon me that while I had thought through providing a balanced meal in the sense of many food groups, types, etc, I had not taken much time to consider the colors involved. Imagine my mortification when I realized everything I was planning to serve was either yellow or orange!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!

Martha would be horrified. Thankfully, our guests, Miss Randa and Mr. Garrett (or Mr. Carrot as Jonathan calls him!) were not quite as critical! Thanks, guys!! But just so you can picture it, here is what we had:

Chicken Enchiladas
Sweet Potatoes
Cantaloupe
Corn Chips/Salsa
(I know Mom, there’s no green vegetable, but I couldn’t think of one which went nicely with Mexican…and my kids won’t eat salad, but they love sweet potatoes and cantaloupe!!)

At any rate, can you envision this amalgamation of yellow-orange screaming with brightness all over our dining table? Which incidently happens to be covered by a yellow cloth and decorated with — oh no!! — DAISIES!!! Horrors!!

Jonathan’s First Shiner

Though I hesitate to write another entry on bodily injury, this one really does merit highlighting. First, some background:

Jonathan is in the midst of an interesting new phase of life: potty training. Though his attitude toward the whole thing does wax and wane depending on his mood, he has now proven his ability to stay dry during the better part of a week. Satisfied with that accomplishment, he is back in the “I will go to the potty when I feel like it” phase. Given he just recently turned two, I think he is doing beautifully, and we are giving him his space on this one.

Well, Monday before his nap, he felt the need to visit the potty and so off he trotted. He did quite well until it came time to climb down when he tripped on his little stepstool (Jonathan is quite short and this particular stool has two levels on it) and fell into the side of the bathtub, eye first.

IMG_1132_small.jpgPoor Jonathan!! He hit just outside the corner of his eye and the area swelled up immediately and turned a pale shade of blue, then a darker shade of blue, then purple. All in about two minutes of time. I know it hurt him terribly, for he cried much longer than he normally would over a “bump”. After comforting him as best I could I made the call to my wonderful pediatric nurse (this was the worst “owie” we’d yet encountered in our 4+ years of parenting) who gave me the ins and outs of this type of injury, what to watch for, etc. Jonathan very sweetly submitted to my ministrations to his eye: icing the injured area while he lay very still in my arms, sucking on a “sticky lollipop” as he calls them.

Three days later my baby boy looks as though someone hauled off and punched him right in the eye. It has turned all various shades of purple, green, red and yellow. We get quite a few curious looks when we are out and about as well as many questions regarding the cause of the injury.

It is hard not to kick myself over this whole thing since I was with Jonathan in the bathroom and right there as he fell (he’s navigated the potty/stool successfully many times). Perhaps this is an early example of Mom not being able to be available to prevent all falls, bumps, bruises, etc. At any rate, we are being very careful with his tender little eye and trying to give extra hugs and kisses to our sweet Jonathan.

The Apple Does Not Fall Far From the Tree!

It was lunchtime, and I’d gotten Abigail and Jonathan seated at the table when the phone rang. I answered the call, and took Nicolas into the nursery to change his diaper while I chatted briefly (I have one of those newfangled headset things which make accomplishing tasks easier while talking). I was only gone for about 3 minutes. When I returned I was shocked to see a little pile of lovely strawberry blonde hair on the floor below Abigail’s chair. There she sat with scissors in hand about to chop off another lock. “NO!!!” I managed to blurt out before I started hyperventilating.

Well, if she has a career as a hairdresser in her future, hopefully her haircutting skills will improve. She didn’t do such a swell job on this her first try. It seems she took a large chunk out of the middle of her bangs and then neatly lopped about 4 inches off either side in front on the long part of her hair. Which had finally grown long and thick enough to pull back in a ponytail. And which had actually been quite pretty, all one length except for her little fringe of bangs.

When I asked her why she was cutting her hair she answered very seriously, “Mom, it’s been a long time since I had a haircut.” This should reinforce the fact that preschoolers don’t have a real well-developed sense of time, because I had just taken her and Jonathan for cuts last month. But she really believed she needed a haircut! Furthermore, in her mind, she wasn’t breaking any rules: I’d never stipulated that we aren’t to use our little play scissors for hair-cutting!

My hairdresser managed to fix up the sides of Abigail’s hair such that they are neatly angled and look a bit more purposeful. As far as the bangs though, it’s just going to take some time. And coincidently, preschool pictures are scheduled for Tuesday. 🙂 We may choose to have her wear a decorative hat!

But this little incident caused me to think back to my own childhood. I remember a scenario rather similar to this one. I was a little older, around 8 I think, when I heard my mom mention that she needed to trim my little sister Sandy’s bangs. “Well,” I thought to myself, “I can help Mom by doing this little job for her.” I know at the time that it never occurred to me that I might be transgressing by cutting my little sister’s hair. Well, I got out my very own pair of blunt-edged play scissors and went to town on Sandy’s coif. If I remember correctly, I trimmed those bangs almost all the way back to her scalp. What I didn’t know was, my mom had already given Sandy the bang trim before I got to her. Oops.

Little Sandy, who had a high hairline and a cute cherubic round face at the time, looked a bit strange for quite a while, thanks to her really helpful big sister. It’s probably good she didn’t know enough to be horrified at what I’d done. Sorry again, Sandy!!

But, thinking back on my own adventures in hair-cutting helped temper my reaction to my own daughter’s behavior. She is much younger than I was when I first forayed into hair-cutting and deserves a chance to learn what is appropriate and what is not. This was a fairly harmless way to do just that. In general, Abigail is quite trustworthy in many things for being only four, and on the whole, she’s very obedient. And certainly having two younger brothers so close in age behind her has caused Jay and I to expect alot of her, and maybe even more than we should. In the grand scheme of things this is really no big deal. And as she said to me yesterday, “Mom, I’ll never cut my hair again!”

Yet Another Blog!

It is with great pleasure that we introduce another blog to you. Our good friends, the Clemmons, have joined our group in Cyberspace and we are very excited! Doubtless you have heard them referenced many times on our blog: Steph is a wonderful friend and another Mommy Swap Buddy. Our kids are all very good chums (little British term there!). David is both a friend and co-worker of Jay’s. We look forward to hearing their thoughts, musings and goings-on! Welcome, Friends Clemmons!! 🙂

Oopsy-Daisy!!

So who knew painting could be so dangerous?? It seemed a simple enough task. There I was, diligently finishing up the last part of my little project, pleased that I would be done just before Jay arrived home, so he could witness the fruits of my labor. ladder_fall.jpgAfter debating about it for several months, I had finally removed several hangers for curtains that we left attached above our window frames in the living areas of the house when we moved in. Just in case we decided to use the rods: they were already paid for and installed, so moving them seemed silly if indeed we were going to just put curtains on them sometime “soon”. Well, after a year and a half with no curtains to speak of, I decided they must come down. And, besides, I’m hostessing a baby shower tomorrow at the house so this was a great incentive to get going on my little project.

But, as I was saying, I was close to finished: I’d unscrewed the curtain hardware, which was tricky (to me) because I had to learn about an “Allen wrench” (thank you Steph for the brief lesson, thank you Jay for having a well-stocked tool bench!); spackled neatly over all the little holes the screws left and was painting over the spackle above my last set of windows in our living room. These windows are the tallest I had to work on, so I was straddled atop our six foot ladder (which I’d been using throughout this project without any trouble), balancing my little paint can and brush. As I went to apply the paint, I suddenly felt the ladder just “go away” from underneath me. All 130 pounds of me plus my very open, very full paint can went flying through the air. In that instant as I fell all I could think was, “Hold the paint can steady, Trish, or you will make a terrible mess all over the rug!” (And that just wouldn’t do with 35-40 guests due to show up in less than 24 hours!!)

As I crashed to the floor, it occurred to me that I was in a fair amount of pain. There was a large bleeding gash on my right thigh, a welt forming on the back of my left leg, another bruised lump on my right shin, and my right big toe was throbbing, the result of gouging a hole at the base of it. Besides these quite visible injuries, I had additionally “sat down” rather hard on the ladder when I fell…ouch. However, I had successfully held the paint can steady!! Except for a teeny dribble along the side of the can, I’d kept the liquid contained.

When Jay arrived home, accompanied by our friend David as they had picked up folding chairs from the church in prep for tomorrow’s festivities, I did not get to show them quite the completed job I’d hoped for. However, they were properly sympathetic toward my wounds and duly impressed with my heroic saving of the paint. Thanks, Guys!

After inspecting the fallen ladder, we can only surmise that for whatever reason, the ladder, a six foot metal one with hinged middle and sides so as to allow it to double as a “platform”, buckled at the hinge on one of its sides, thereby causing the entire structure to essentially fold up and fall over with me on top. Though it was rather low on my list of things I wanted to do tonight, I managed to get up the courage to climb the ladder to finish painting my last few patches of spackle. Thankfully, I got to also climb back down this time instead of being dropped! I assure you that I shall hereafter maintain a greater sense of respect for all ladders!!